Selfcare – it’s a bit of a buzz word at the moment, but what is it really?
I know I have written about this before but I feel that it is important to keep reminding ourselves that Selfcare is Healthcare.
I remember a health professional asking me some years ago how I ‘selfcare’, and even though I thought I did selfcare, I really was not sure how to respond the question.
I mentioned that I ate a reasonably healthy diet, that I exercised regularly, that I take care of my physical health. Ahh, but what about your mental health, she asked. Now we were getting to the core of it! Turns out, I was not completing the full picture when it came to my own selfcare:
Did I put my needs before the needs of others? Well, no. I did not want to be seen as selfish.
Did I have strong healthy boundaries? Boundaries? Hmm, probably not.
Did I take time for myself when I need to rest? Not always
Did I say yes to others when I would really prefer to say no? That would a definite yes.
Did I have a voice, and could I speak up for myself? Well, I certainly have a voice, I just was not using it as effectively as I needed to.
So, what is Selfcare? Selfcare involves nourishing all parts of you, your physical, mental, and emotional bodies, remembering that they are all interlinked. If we want to live a full happy and healthy life, if we want to be there for others, then we need to selfcare!
Selfcare can be different for each of us, and as we move through the different stages of life our selfcare changes. Now I am a great one for making a ‘To Do’ list but selfcare is NOT a checklist of activities. Don’t make it a check list because you are simply putting yourself under more pressure. Selfcare can be about doing what makes your heart sing, or what allows you to feel empowered, it is prioritizing yourself. It is not about throwing yourself a few crumbs if time allows.
Selfcare can be hard for some of us. It may mean that we must change our habits or our way of thinking. It may mean putting boundaries in place, and that may affect some of our significant relationships. It may be uncomfortable, and for most of us we will do anything to get away from discomfort. Do not let that be the reason you sacrifice selfcare, our greatest accomplishments come when we courageously move through the barriers of discomfort.
It’s been a long journey for me, but my level of selfcare has greatly improved. I have found the courage to speak my truth, I have strengthened my boundaries, I regularly fill my cup by spending time with kind souls, and mostly I put my needs high on my list. I am lucky that my work is my passion, and my passion brings me such joy.
‘Caring for yourself is a necessary part of caring for others’ – ROBYN CONLEY DOWNS